E.A.T Finale: When we know better, we do better!

The first step I took to grabbing the reins of my life was to take responsibility for my body and how I care for it. In the beginning of September I met with Lisa Carpenter, founder of the 10 week E.A.T. Program, which I wrote about in one of my first blog posts “My Starting Point”.

Ten sessions have since passed and last night was the big reveal and  I was blown away, not just by me losing 27 lbs, 23 inches and over 7% in body fat – but the PICTURES!! I am not ready to show you all of them because honestly, they are “too raw” if that makes sense. It feels like yesterday I was there – in a year I might but not tonight. The best I will do is give you the back fat shot – dramatic to say the least. You can only imagine (if you really want to..) what the front looked like..haha. Enjoy…. uuggh.

I did this by following the structure that Lisa puts forth – eating 5 meals EVERY day that were rich in lean protein, smart carbohydrates (including bread AND potatoes!), lots of leafy greens, healthy fats (Omega 3, 6 & 9s) and mountains of fresh vegetables and fruit. In comparison to previous attempts, it was refreshing to see no quick fixes, no magic powders or shakes to drink, shots or blood work to take and NO deprivation. I honestly didn’t expect it to work! LOL!

And get this, I even did this with a few nights of wine and junky food – difference was I enjoyed the hell out of it and just picked up where I left off the next day. No more sabotage. Eureka!

When people ask me what I’m doing to lose the weight and I tell them about the course, I sometimes get resistance with only answering the question by saying “I took a course on eating for weight loss and optimal health”. Like today, when a woman (I don’t know) asked me, she immediately said “Sounds like hard work.. (grimace face)” and then she asked me to tell her more so I did but she quickly cut me off saying “Oh I do all that already” and “I eat healthy but it doesn’t work” And although I REALLY wanted to engage because I’m super passionate about what I learned and love how it’s going to serve me for the rest of my life!!!…. I stop myself because I’m not here to convince anyone of anything. I’m just glad I found my way to it and also remember being in the same place. I wouldn’t have wanted to hear it either..haha.

The difference for me this time is that I was ready to admit whatever I was doing wasn’t working and think a lot of the success that happens in this course is when people show up, do the hard work and open themselves up to shifting their position or attitude – whatever it is. This is hard to do if you are hell-bent on believing you NEED cheese to live (believe me, I tried!!).

I surrendered and let go of what I thought I knew. This was the hardest part of the course for me and if you are ready to do this and want the change bad enough –you can make BIG changes and it is WAY EASIER than you think. There was never a time where I wanted to quit but I was annoyed and irritated with food logging and having to shift my thinking and behaviors. Most of the time this was just old patterns and my troll trying to sabotage my progress (note still working on this even though they are getting further and further away).

 How am I different now?

• I don’t eat cheese at every meal … or at all for that matter (I just heard a collective GASP from my friends & family).
• I’m less about a destination and see this as a daily, meal by meal way of living. In time, my body will catch up and be its optimal size.
• I found myself RUNNING up the stairs carrying six bags of groceries yesterday. No calling Scott from the car to come help. Laughed when I noticed this.
• I play with my boys differently – lifting the big one up more, rough housing, running, chasing and climbing at the park. We have more fun together.
• I gorged myself on 3 CUPS of BRUSSEL SPROUTS tonight dressed in pureed avocado, horseradish and red chilli sauce, salt & pepper…. and LOVED IT! I made the bowl for the family and ended up eating the entire thing myself! What the…??!!!!
• My 3 year old doesn’t beg for juice anymore. BIG WIN! He yells for water and it’s music to my ears!
• I have now begun incorporating my new knowledge into my family’s meals with success.
• Even though I still loath food logging, I see the value in it and will go back when I feel myself slipping. It’s a good way to keep mindful about the food I’m eating and why.
• I’m armed with tools to get me though eating out, Christmas parties and my own self-sabotage.
• I feel a sense of calm in the journey now – less roller coaster and ‘good’ ‘bad’ mentality. I’m human and will make less than stellar choices but will move forward the next day instead of derailing the process.
• I read food labels and understand them on a whole new level.
• I feel SO much more confident in my own skin and love that my wardrobe doubled now that I can fit into my thinner clothes.
• My husband is reaping the rewards of a happier, healthier, ‘rock star’ feeling wife 😉

That being said, now that the classes are over, I need to keep my “I got this” mentality in check because it’s only been 10 classes and this is something I want for the rest of my life. Definitely something I will need to check in on every now and then at the Alumni events which I’m looking forward to. Once you become a member of the E.A.T crew, you are welcomed into a family of other women on the same path with support, recipes and stories to share about how to ‘keep going’. Love it and can’t wait.

Thank you Lisa and the amazing women I shared this journey with over the past two months. I look forward to connecting again and seeing what else we are capable of!

Although I am forever changed and happy the majority of the weight I wanted to lose is gone, this was the beginning piece of a much bigger puzzle for me to live life with more purpose. Today, I reached week  8 in my 5K running program and ran 28 minutes in a row without stopping 🙂 This weekend I head into the second to last course of coach training-action and continue to explore this possible career change. I also started a fun grassroots “movement” with a handful of fellow community-lovers to inspire, educate and convert locals in Steveston to connect our community even more using the power of social media. We created a bulletin board on Facebook called  #SocialSteveston: Our Community and launched the #SocialSteveston web page where events and resources will be posted on how to get involved. We are planning a larger kick-off meeting with local businesses and community leaders in the coming weeks to see where this will go.

Before I sign off, it has to be said that although I am glad to be out of “the well” and feeling more alive and engaged with the world than ever before, I am officially in uncharted territory now. I’ve been in ‘action-mode’ for almost three months now and I’m starting to feel the effects of the shifts happening. The original ‘kick-ass and take names’ part of me is now feeling more like ‘where the hell am I and what’s next’… which feels a LOT scarier and uncertain. Enter the whispers of my troll.

Thank God Peter and I are reuniting this weekend after months apart so I’m hoping to get some much needed ‘catch-up’ coaching to see what shakes out. I’ll be sure to report back.

Thank you all for following along with comments, emails and updates from fellow 5 and 10K runners around the world who inspire me to keep going.

Until next time, with much love and gratitude, Ker

Did I just do that?

So one of the things I’m practicing in my journey to a bigger life is telling that shitty voice in my head who lists all the reasons why I shouldn’t or couldn’t do something … to shut the hell up. So, after my original post talking about getting back into fighting shape, a friend on Facebook suggested I join her for the 6:15 class at the new spinning gym, Spinergy Fitness in Steveston Village on Wednesday.

“Haha..(said the voice in my head), You? Spin? Nope, that’s for the fit mom’s with high ponytails and tight butts. Not you. You’ll hurt yourself for sure.”

So, to spite the little bugger, I quickly wrote her back “Count me in!”

The more I thought about it, the more I truly worried that I might actually hurt myself – and this wasn’t anyone’s voice but my own talking now. People… I am REALLY out of shape. And I’m not a person with low self-esteem. I like myself… aloh! So much that I really didn’t want to hurt my awesome self. I am a realist. Last time I even semi-regularly worked out was  five years ago and even then it was a burst of 6 months and then I was done with it.And FYI, during one of those boot camp-type sessions I put my back out so bad that I was laid up for a week!

Then I said to myself “Just shut up and let’s do this.” (hence the title on this blog – I say this a lot now)

I called up Spinergy and spoke with one of their people who assured me I would NOT hurt myself. That I was in control of how hard I pushed myself and the tension on the bike. They were very understanding of my newbie concerns and encouraged me to give it a try. OK. Due diligence complete.

To make this happen I had to wake up at 5AM to pump so hubby could feed Beau, our four month old, if he woke up before I got back. Once I was up and moving it really wasn’t that bad. Next thing I know I was ready and heading out the door. When I arrived, said friend pulled right up after and I was officially doing this.

After signing the standard ‘Please don’t sue us if you die whilst spinning’  forms, I met one of the owners and primary instructor, Shannon Marshall and her trusty sidekick, Matt, who was working the computer behind the sign in desk – both VERY nice and super welcoming. I began to feel at ease.

How do I explain what happened over the following 50 mins? Well first, it’s true that the seats hurt your butt and although at times mine was screaming for mercy, there were good chunks of time where I was so focused on what I was being asked to do by Shannon  (over some of the most motivating ass-kicking tracks, ever) that the discomfort faded away and wasn’t an issue – I was actually doing it. I was spinning for crack’s sake! And although I was somewhat distracted by the excess bits of my body giggling and shaking with every pedal, instead of feeling defeated at this shitty reminder of how big my body has become or self-conscious, I heard myself shouting at it from a very powerful place, saying “Get. The. Feck. OFF! Get off! Get off!!!”

This made me laugh thinking about it after. What a refreshing perspective. I liked it.

What was the best and most surprising part? Early into the ride when we were just warming up she told us to close our eyes, get into the music and find our zone and just give it whatever we had. Next thing I knew, the gym disappeared and I was transformed to the road with the wind blowing in my face (strategic fans) and it all became a bit more do-able. I found whenever I opened my eyes, I was distracted and less motivated. There was something very zen-like in the way Shannon guided the group with her voice over the music – not a Drill Sargent (which is what I expected) but assertive, supportive, inspiring and also seemed to say all the things I needed to hear as I puffed and panted my way along. It reminded me at times of yoga with a very internal focus, listening to my body and overcoming that internal mental struggle to push myself up the hill much like trying to hold a difficult yoga move. And then we’d get permission to release the tension and the sweet relief of gliding down a steep hill with the wind in my face was intoxicating. I got it. People love this workout because its incredibly efficient and that’s just what I need. Show up, sweat your face off and get out. I’d like to add it to my cardio efforts at least once a week in combination to the Couch to 5K running program. Gotta love a plan.

To walk into my house after a really great sweat and see my husband feeding our baby and 3 year old, Denny happily playing and greeting me with a huge hug – I couldn’t help feel a huge sense of accomplishment. I did it and I CAN do this. Awesome.

And not only did I do it WITHOUT hurting myself it was a great way to start to my day and I’m still smiling. Although Shannon tweeted me later to say I may not be smiling tomorrow.

Oh shit.